You, the Closet, and the Truth
Josh Morgan
Issue date: 4/23/09 Section: News and Opinion
Who keeps us safe? The government and for most people it is their religion, or God. All major religions condemn the practice of homosexuality and if so many people follow it, it must be right! So then why are there those that have broken off from that ideology and formed their own congregations or the other brave ones who have broadened their beliefs to include the acceptance of homosexuals?
We fear the people that would easily shun us for even hinting at the fact that we might be an irreversible different. Our self-reflection helps us to reconcile this fear with our need to be happy as human beings; our need to be at peace with ourselves so that others can be at peace with us. Once we have accepted ourselves for who we are, we can reach out to our friends and family for their support and acceptance. Acknowledging the fact that you are gay to yourself doesn't bring you out of the closet, but you do have your hands on the door knobs. Now all that's left is the feeling of freedom that will make you pull the doors back and truly be free.
For most people this feeling comes from the acceptance of those close to us. We need companionship with other humans to be happy. I know I do. Make sure you have researched homosexuality in order to answer questions you may have but also to counter any objections someone else might bring up. Then you should identify anyone close to you that would respond favorably. This is the next major leap we have to take. For some it is their best friend, a sibling, a parent, a rabbi/preacher, a therapist, or a mentor. For me, it was the girl I "dated" in middle school, who is a very open and accepting person, but right after her was my best friend of over 11 years now.
If you receive a negative reaction don't take it personally by acting angry or defensive. This person grew up in the same culture you did and you probably had adverse feelings towards homosexuality previously as well. If you receive a positive reaction, then you are off to an excellent start! I moved through my circles of friends starting with the closest one and branched out. My family was the last group to know, or rather the last group I was ready to tell.
We fear the people that would easily shun us for even hinting at the fact that we might be an irreversible different. Our self-reflection helps us to reconcile this fear with our need to be happy as human beings; our need to be at peace with ourselves so that others can be at peace with us. Once we have accepted ourselves for who we are, we can reach out to our friends and family for their support and acceptance. Acknowledging the fact that you are gay to yourself doesn't bring you out of the closet, but you do have your hands on the door knobs. Now all that's left is the feeling of freedom that will make you pull the doors back and truly be free.
For most people this feeling comes from the acceptance of those close to us. We need companionship with other humans to be happy. I know I do. Make sure you have researched homosexuality in order to answer questions you may have but also to counter any objections someone else might bring up. Then you should identify anyone close to you that would respond favorably. This is the next major leap we have to take. For some it is their best friend, a sibling, a parent, a rabbi/preacher, a therapist, or a mentor. For me, it was the girl I "dated" in middle school, who is a very open and accepting person, but right after her was my best friend of over 11 years now.
If you receive a negative reaction don't take it personally by acting angry or defensive. This person grew up in the same culture you did and you probably had adverse feelings towards homosexuality previously as well. If you receive a positive reaction, then you are off to an excellent start! I moved through my circles of friends starting with the closest one and branched out. My family was the last group to know, or rather the last group I was ready to tell.
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long distance movers
posted 5/20/09 @ 4:24 PM AST
Very well written article. It is not an easy experience and hopefully you have made it a little easier for other people who have read this. It helps a lot when you have support from your parents and friends, but even then, the path to figuring yourself out and figuring out how to present yourself to others is never an easy one. (Continued…)
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